BY Jeff Brown
It's the most, wonderful time, of the year... Holiday season is upon us! County fairs, fall festivals, pumpkin patches, homecomings, haunted houses! Football starting, baseball playoffs, Thanksgiving! And for most in the western world, Christmas!
But you know what else the fall is best for? Finding love...
But your chances of finding love will surprisingly be reduced if you start with these 5 date venues.
It's usually too damn loud! Sure, you could find a quite hole in the wall place, but then you're only one step up from a coffee shop.
And yes, there is the wildcard that is alcohol, guaranteed to lower inhibitions but no such promise on making you compatible (or friendly) with one another. You'll also likely have to continually deal with the distraction of other prospective suitors and suit-ettes awkwardly mingling, interrupting, and trying to impress each other with their guard up as well.
4. Coffee Shops
"The little coffee shop of horrors." I give coffee shops a hard time. Unfairly? Maybe a little. It has become way to trendy and trite to meet someone at a coffee shop for a first date.
And yes, I get it. You like coffee, it seems like the cool thing to do, and she feels more comfortable "getting to know you." The problem is it's too much talking, and not enough doing. We'll get to that in a bit.
Bo-Ring! Hey, if you're starving from doing something fun and active, by all means, go to a restaurant and chow down. But if you're using it as your sole method of getting to know each other on your first date, well... you're not setting a very creative example.
You can't talk at all. You just sit there in awkward silence wondering what the other is thinking about and what your supposed to do, and then all of a sudden you find yourself watching something similar to the following infamous scene unfold with someone you just started dating (true story).
Nothing kills any thoughts of escalating faster than a film noir homosexual to heterosexual rape scene, with a gimp... BRING OUT THE GIMP!
1. Anything over the top
a.) Nothing too expensive. It sets a bad precedent that you're trying to buy her love and affection, and/or are just trying to show off.
b.) Nothing too personal. Don't take her home to meet mom and dad, or go out of your way to be romantic.
Women don't like the feeling that a man is ahead of them romantically. It makes them feel skittish deep down and lowers their interest. Do either of the above at your own peril - and don't say you didn't know after she freaks the ehhF out and ghost's you!
^ Does this woman look happy? ^
Hell no. She'd rather be chasing this guy, but he's too damn needy to ever give her a chance.
The reality is that chemistry is not rational, but instead a feeling. Coffee shops and restaurants at the beginning of a courtship can too easily turn into an interview. An interview that is stacked against men regardless of whether either party realizes it or not. Countless women’s interest levels have died a premature death in these settings.
So what is a new couple supposed to do while testing the waters of a new romance?
You experience fun, active, cultural things! You partake in activities with a good balance of saying and doing. Get out of the shops and onto the streets (or in the fields) with all of the beautiful celebrations of this crazy world.
Have adventures together.
With my wife Robin, some of her favorite dates early on were going ice skating at the Galleria Mall, racing Top Fuel dragsters at Speed Zone, staying up late at the piano bar (hey, at least it had singing) on New Year’s Eve and getting up early to go freeze our butts off at the Cotton Bowl the next morning.
Even to this day, with three little ones running around and responsibility up to our eyeballs, we find ways to experience new things and have adventures together.
Don't have any good ideas of what to do on dates? Gotcha covered. Here's 101!
The key to successful date selection is twofold. First, create unique experiences together where you can also connect on a deeper, more emotional level.
Second, to set yourself up more easily for physical escalation. You'll be looking for romantic opportunities to get closer to one another and potentially kiss.
Other than that, different girls enjoy different things. The dates don’t have to be perfect, and the most memorable ones are usually the ones that don’t go according to plan.
Ready to experience new adventures with a beautiful woman? Show her your different from the other guys and she might just keep you around ;)
READING A WOMAN'S INTEREST LEVEL JUST GOT A LOT EASIER
HOW I FIGURED OUT WOMEN - THE REPTILIAN BRAIN
7 INNER TRAITS THAT MAKE ALL WOMEN FEEL CHEMISTRY
Need one on one help for a specific situation? Check out my coaching page for how I can help you!